Successful parenting after divorce

Successful parenting after divorce – informations! You might think that a separation from your significant other is one of the most horrible things one can experience through life, but it’s not even a half of what children have to endure. During a divorce, the children get to see life as they know it torn apart, and most of the times they can’t do anything about it. Your marriage might have come to an end, but their life is just beginning.
Don’t hold it against the children
It is extremely important to make sure that in the case of a divorce, children don’t get involved in the struggle unless it is strictly necessary as this might trigger feelings of guilt and grudge in them. If you are getting divorced don’t use children as weapons, instead help them to get through this difficult process in the least uncomfortable way. Letting them know that they are not guilty of your separation is a key element for successful parenting after divorce.
Make them feel you are still a family
As the kid’s world has been split, you must never say bad things about your former spouse as this is a very bad influence on them that will eventually cause more trouble for all of you and make successful parenting after divorce very difficult. You must acknowledge that even if you don’t love each other anymore, you both have never stopped loving your children.
Manage your time appropriately.

Successful parenting after divorce

Successful parenting after divorce

As you and your former lover will start new stages in your lives, it is important to take into account your parenting responsibilities. Your children need attention, now more than ever, and even though it is important to move on from a failed relationship, fulfilling your parent duties must become your priority number one. However, it is also important to have in mind each other time capabilities as either giving too much or too little time with one of the parents is irresponsible and inconvenient for successful parenting after divorce. Make agreements together and respect them, if you need to change something, make sure you talk about it with enough anticipation.
Divorce doesn’t start a competition.
Children should have contact with both of their parents even if they are divorced. Do not try to become their “favorite” as this will only make the transition more confusing and may trigger undesired behaviors in them. This is very important especially when it comes to the economic factor, many divorced parents think that they can buy their children’s love or compensate small amounts of time together with them by buying them gifts or taking them to expensive places. Money cannot replace love and care!
Make them part of your new life.
A divorce is a very traumatizing experience as children get to develop feelings of alienation sometimes, it is important that you make sure they have room in your new lifestyle. Even if you get married again, give your children their own place (probably over your new love interests) and make sure they have an active participation in your everyday activities, even if it is something small. Never underestimate the power of a phone call or a text message.
Think about their opinions too.
Successful parenting after divorce

Successful parenting after divorce

A very important element for successful parenting after divorce is to make sure you know what they want and how they feel. Before making difficult decisions that involve then, have them tell you their thoughts. Getting to agree about who the children live with is a tough call, some parents just want to take the children for pride, and others because they know they will be able to provide economic stability, but it is also very important to have in mind what the children actually want. Even though sometimes your children would prefer things that cannot happen due to external situations, the only fact of asking them their opinion will make them feel loved and cared for, and, in the best case, they might help you to make a complicated choice.
Successful parenting after divorce is one of the most difficult challenges in society today, however, it is not impossible and with a little effort and care, you can make sure that you always do what is best for your children. Just remember that they are people too, with their own feelings, fears, and priorities. Be aware that they are the most affected by a divorce!
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27. Februar 2016 | Posted in Familie
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